Importer/Exporter | Screen Name Kris | My best tweets don't get RTd | Founded @slcdunk | RT, you cowards! | Never, ever happy |

Joined August 2009
Wade Phillips on the Eagles defense: "There's only two plays that they can't stop. That's the run and the pass."
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I just talked to an even more inside insider. Prepare even more nowly.
Just talked to an insider. Prepare now.
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Kris retweeted
“who should we lay off first” CEOs:
BREAKING: Microsoft, $MSFT, is offering buyouts to 60,000 workers as part of the company’s efforts to cut costs amid AI adoption, per Bloomberg. Personnel on select teams in the US, Canada, India, and the UK at a vice president level and below will be eligible. This reflects ~27% of Microsoft's total workforce.
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The male urge to calculate ticket sales and overhead when walking around Cornbelly’s with the fam
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Cufflinks a bit over the top
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List of better potential superbowl halftime shows than Jay-Z: 1. Weird Al
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I’ve asked this before but is there any historical event that is like the Opposite of 9/11. Like something so good that happened that it changed the world forever
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𝗚𝗜𝗩𝗘𝗔𝗪𝗔𝗬: Win 2 tickets to see The @SmashingPumpkin at the #DeltaCenter on October 29! To enter: 1️⃣Follow @deltacenter 2️⃣RT 3️⃣Tag a friend *The winner will be DM'd TOMORROW.
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We LOVED getting these on deployment. Kids would draw the wildest stuff and teachers clearly weren't reviewing them. They would draw Army men shooting people and blood coming out and then it would say "I hope you don't die." Everyone looked forward to getting them.
There is nothing more earnest or unhinged than kids’ letters to the troops
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Cris Collinsworth is out here glazing Patrick Mahomes for going after HIS OWN fumble 😭
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Kris retweeted
Cris Collinsworth straight up leaving the broadcasting booth after Patrick Mahomes threw an INT is one of the funniest moments of the season
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This is not a joke. This arm appeared on my screen as I was drafting a post.
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What in the h.e.c.k is this arm doing on my screen, X?
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i can’t even prepare you for who’s on sax😭
Elite sax reveal 😂
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restore your gold fish dignity
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I can’t make the Mammoth game tomorrow. Great seats (2) available Selling 2 tickets for Utah Mammoth vs Minnesota Wild (Tue, Oct 27, 7:00 PM). Section 135, Row 1 at $95.00/ticket on Beehive Tickets. beehivetickets.com/listing/a…
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NBA makes deals with Polymarket and Kalshi, says "protecting the integrity of the game is our top priority" blah blah blah truehoop.com/p/polymarkets-1…
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When the “Iraqi resistance” fighters notice the subtitles mid-interview and completely lose it 😂🤣
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