I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
lately my 4-yr-old has been really into dry, uncooked everything bagels. so this has resulted in him asking us for an "everything bagel with nothing" which is objectively really funny
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
Begged my boyfriend to take a picture of this vet sign I saw while in the uber home last night because my phone was dead. I was drunk and it made me so emotional. I just kept repeating “the cat is helping the dog. The cat is helping the dog”
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
my friend kevin got the new grand theft auto early and he says its woke. and theres a modest mouse radio station.
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
"He who was my companion through adventure and hardship is gone forever…"
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
Steely Dan’s the making of aja but everyone is a muppet except Michael McDonald
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
Replying to @jakebrodes
Gulf of Never Letting Up No Matter What. Gulf of Belts To Ass All Summer Long
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
Western boomers with 5 years left to live would forcefully throw their 18 year old grandson into the reactor so they could spend their remaining years gambling their inheritance on slot machines.
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I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
I went 2school w/a cloak since1st days;it was uncomfortable 2wear it in front f other kids,but I tried 2make up 4it by being naughty&playful
I Am Butter Bessie retweeted
(Baseball game)
Hotdog guy: hotdogs!
Me waving him down: all good over here
Him: what?
Me standing up and going to him: I don’t want a hotdog





























