Mitt-Flops (@MittFlops) profile picture

Mitt-Flops

@MittFlops

Hopefully, I'll be in the White House next year. Unless you'd prefer I be somewhere else. http://t.co/Rv9v2wZ1jz

Mitt-Flops.com
Joined February 2012
  • Tweets1.4K
  • Following35
  • Followers77
6Media
Photo by Mitt-Flops (@MittFlops)
#WomensDay2017
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Can you put your Fleshlight in the dishwasher? Asking for a friend.
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RT @SportsBar_Brand He would have needed wings to stop that pass. Boneless wings from @SportsBar_Brand. #BadBrandTweets #SB48
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RT @Restaurant_Brand: No matter who wins tonight game, dinner’s on us. #BadBrandTweets #SuperBowl
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RT @Car_Brand Hey fuck you, @Beer_Brand and @Soda_Brand, nobody out Americas us.
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RT @Truck_Brand Wow, he just trucked right over him as if he was driving our full-size with leather interior and GPS nav. #BadBrandTweets
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RT @Restaurant_Brand He would have needed wings to catch that pass! Someone should tell him to swing by our place to pick up a few dozen.
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RT @Car_Brand Peyton has so much ground to cover, he’ll need one of our 100 MPG hybrids! #BadBrandTweet #SuperBowl
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RT @Snack_Brand More like Percy Starvin’ for some snacks. That’s why he was in a hurry! #BadBrandTweets #SuperBowl
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RT @Shipping_Brand Percy Harvin makes returns look almost as easy as we do! #BadBrandTweets #SuperBowl
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The failed assassination of the Bulgarian Prime Minister just underscores the need for greater education about gun maintenance. #NRATips
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Just in time for the election, my Mitt-Flops!!! cafepress.com/mittflopflipfl… /cc @MittFlops @MittRomney @TeamRomney @cafepress
Image from Mike Hunter (@diabolical_mdog)
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My thoughts and prayers go out to 53% of you. #MittStormTips #Sandy
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I assume that Sandy is short for Sanford, a man's name. #MittStormTips #Sandy
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In light of the storm we should cancel all early voting. Especially in and around major urban centers. #MittStormTips #Sandy
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Still not sure this qualifies as a "legitimate storm." #MittStormTips #Sandy
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To avoid falling branches, purchase the parent company, leverage them up with debt and then declare bankruptcy. #MittStormTips #Sandy
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To all fans returning home from games of athletic sport, be careful! #MittStormTips #Sandy
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Remember, if you're in Ohio and thinking of voting early, don't leave the house! #MittStormTips #Sandy
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Transfer gold doubloons to elevated safe. #MittStormTips #Sandy
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