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Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture

Andrew Fowler

@fowlerism

silly billy

 Earth's OUTER core
nitter.gq/i/events/1010216672483991552
Joined March 2009
  • Tweets2.6K
  • Following579
  • Followers3.1K
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Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)Photo by Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism)
Andrew Fowler retweeted
Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture
Andrew Fowler@fowlerism9 Aug 2018
[Me as a cop] Partner: Dude you gotta work on your catchphrase Me: *slamming criminal's head on car hood* UNLIMITED BREADSTICKS
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
carmeb (@therealcbrad) profile picture
carmeb@therealcbrad27 Sep 2024
I hope this email kills us both
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture
Andrew Fowler@fowlerism19 Oct 2019
Okay so in this joke it's an episode of Antiques Roadshow but it's the 18th century and the guy is like "you just bought this"
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
Brooks Otterlake (@i_zzzzzz) profile picture
Brooks Otterlake@i_zzzzzz21 Jul 2024
A 31 year old Joe Biden just woke up from a long nap on the Amtrak. All he remembers from the dream is a white rectangle that could hold a thousand songs
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture
Andrew Fowler@fowlerism26 Apr 2019
Hey girl, are you a bicycle? Cause I've been diagnosed with visual agnosia
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture
Andrew Fowler@fowlerism14 May 2018
THE ANAGRAM KILLER: If you ever want to see your family again, you have ten seconds to anagram the word... "dictation" ME: *sobbing* I can't do it
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
kathleen (@kathleen_hanley) profile picture
kathleen@kathleen_hanley16 Oct 2022
bob costas: “we’re here in cleveland, where the slight autumn chill in the air is a bleak reminder of the chilling fact that each day we are all spiraling towards the unavoidable conclusion we call death” ron darling: “i think he goes fastball here”
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i never should have gone back to school
Image from Phil Jamesson (@PhilJamesson)
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Whoomp, Where Is It Now?: A Retrospective
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
Russell (@208RAB) profile picture
Russell@208RAB29 Nov 2018
Some people don’t know that “it’s” is short for “it is,” but it’s
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Andrew Fowler (@fowlerism) profile picture
Andrew Fowler@fowlerism12 May 2019
Don't forget to call Shaft today even though he's a bad mother
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katie (@skatie420) profile picture
katie@skatie42019 Apr 2022
[showing off my new baby] we named her after my grandmother, her name is Grandma.
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
The Onion (@TheOnion) profile picture
The Onion
@TheOnion16 Apr 2022
Researchers Determine Coelacanth Faked Own Extinction To Escape Massive Gambling Debt bit.ly/3JV1Jkl
Image from The Onion (@TheOnion)
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the hype (@TheHyyyype) profile picture
the hype@TheHyyyype25 Mar 2022
me: *hands him $50 gift certificate* waiter: sorry, this is expired me: *sliding him a $50* how about now
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Johnson's Baby Shampoo: Oops! All Tears
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niiiiiice
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Fresh Lettuce (@newLettuce) profile picture
Fresh Lettuce@newLettuce3 Feb 2022
Me: I stabbed a man with an icicle. The perfect crime Antarctica cop: First of all thanks for telling me
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girlfriend: tell me your wildest fantasy me: grimace girlfriend: from McDonald’s? me: no grimace from Hoboken yes from McDonald’s you fucken weirdo
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Andrew Fowler retweeted
chris (@BassoonJokes) profile picture
chris@BassoonJokes31 Dec 2021
Morpheus: you believe it is the year 1999 when it is actually closer to 2199 Neo: does everybody still love raymond
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what do you call a deer with no legs and arms still no idea
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